Because it wasn't bad enough having to wait until 3 A.M. for the drunken idiots across the hall to pass out back in college--now there will be no stopping them!
At first, beer with caffeine sounds like a terrific idea. With caffeine in your beer, you can stay awake longer and do many delightful things, such as drink more beer. It's a beer-drinker's vision of heaven. Homer Simpson would love it. Kallman certainly does.I have a feeling this new drink could mean the end of my beloved college home:
"It's a wonderful feeling," she says. "Sometimes beer makes you sleepy or sluggish, but with Moonshot, you feel alert. You can go out and dance and have fun instead of falling asleep on the couch."
Alas, there is a potential downside to this great breakthrough. Drinking too much beer sometimes makes people do stupid things, such as fighting with strangers. Or sleeping with strangers. Or calling your ex-girlfriend at 3 in the morning to tearfully beg her to come back -- a supplication frequently accompanied by a dubious promise to stop drinking.
Until now, beer guzzling was a self-regulating activity. Sure, drinking too much made you do stupid things. But drinking too much also tended to make you fall asleep before you got into trouble. Passing out is nature's way of saying you drank too much, and it has saved many a beer drinker from acute embarrassment. But with caffeine keeping beer drinkers cranked up, there's no end to the fun. Which could get ugly.
If tired, drunken college-aged boys could rip a urinal off a wall and cause a flood, imagine what wide-awake, drunken college-aged boys will do?